the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
