my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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