JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
