Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
My boob is missing a layer of skin
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
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