hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
