Duck Duck Cougar?
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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