who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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