You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
Randomize
