And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize