That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Randomize
