My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
how do flat chested girls get laid?
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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