so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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