just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
