walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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