we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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