is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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