I molested 6 butterflies tonight
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
You left your phone here
Wait...
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