Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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