oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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