now i know why i became what i already was.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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