Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
