Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
