We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
