i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
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