I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
