i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
