i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
And then my night got REAL pukey
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize