I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize
