SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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