honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
