exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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