i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
