She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
