My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
You're earring is so big in my mouth
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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