Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
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