idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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