His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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