Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
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