party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize