We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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