I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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