I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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