im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
