Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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