I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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