so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Randomize
