i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
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