Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Randomize
