Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
