You're so nebulous sometimes
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
