i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
